Archive for the ‘divorce mediation’ Category
Is divorce mediation better than getting an uncontested divorce?
can anyone tell me how the whole process works? I have been researching the matter online but I would like to hear from people that have actually gone thru a divorce. My husband keeps putting off the divorce. He is the one that originally wanted the divorce but now I think I want it too. what are my options? if I wait on him to get the divorce it will never happen. I dont have a lot of money but I may have to be the one to initiate things because he keeps putting it off. What are your suggestions?
OK, first, let me express my sympathy for the end of your marriage. That is never easy no matter how much you want out.
Now, Here are the differences and what you need to know.
AN uncontested divorce is a divorce were both parties agree they want to end the marriage. The do not file grounds of abuse or adultery, they just decide to go thier seperate ways and thats that. No mediation is required UNLESS you have a considerable amount of joint property OR, if you are antagonistic (meaning you just hate each other and want to rip one another apart anytime youspeak.)
Now, if you have a large estate, or several holdings that need attending to, you may want a mediator. A mediator will help settle disputes where money is involved, but also between couples who simply can not agree on anything. A mediator will speak between your lawyer and your husband lawyer so you have no contact with your husband or his lawyer. THere is a goodly sized fee for this type of process, however, it is sometimes necassary and worth the added expense.
I recommend making nice with your lawyer and making nice with your husband. 
SO as not to incur added costs and to get the marriage disolved in the least amount of time with the least amount of heartbreak.
Good luck!
Divorce mediation question can you help please?
My brother in Texas is going thru divorce, he had a work related accident which nearly made him a quadriplegic..(his error) his wife left him soon after since he could not support her so grandly anymore and she has alienated their 5 year year old terriby against him I mean it’s totally heartbreaking. heartbreaking..but anyway..he cannot even afford a lawyer , he has asked for and been granted a mediation. My brother keeps talking to his wife’s lawyer, going to tell the lawyer what he’s going to present at mediation and all that , he wants to show that the wife has totally brainwashed and alienated the child,. I told him stop talking to the wife’s lawyer she is not their to help you , prepare your statement for mediation and tell them. What should he do how should he handle the mediation? The wife also has a slightly mentally challenged 50 year old brother living with her that sits in his room all the time he’s home and watches hard core porn
also allowing him to watch the little boy when she is at work. My brother cries after trying to call his son and the by saying I don’t wnt to see ou anymore Daddy I don’t love you.. it’s possibe that the wife is telling the little boy that Daddy doesn’t love him ( the boy) thats why they are not living together the wife is very angry and I think has real emotional problems herself. Sorry to be so long but what can my brother do oe say at the mediation and should he keep talking to the wife’s lawyer?
my brother was an OTR trucker and was not home a whole lot, I guess life was pretty bad when he was home the wife would not let him play the kind of music he likes and my son was down there and said she even criticized the way my brother walks.. the woman really has a lot of problems she is somewhat OCD is what I think and she refuses to believe there is any way to anything but her way..anytime my brother was home and tried to do anything or say anything she was critical he enjoyed being on the road because home obviously was hell, he bought the wife 2 houses and cars tried to be affectionate with her but she said he "sexually harrassed her" if he would make little passes and try to caress her.
he’s not paralyzed he came close he’s recuperating and may need more leg surgeries, his back has healed.. he takes physcal therapy but is mobile he walks.. drives… but just cannot go back to work because the truck will bump him around and that can cause nerve damage. he only lives on 2thousand dollars a month a far cry from the 5 digits monthly wage he used to earn drivng and delivering trucks, and tho he could no longer pay the morgage on the house that was in his name..(the other one was in hers), but has rented a real nice 2 bedroom apt for himself and for his son hopefully for when the little boy is there on visits
Your brother sounds like he is in a tough and complicated situation, and there is no easy answer. He definitely should not be sharing his strategy with an opposing counsel, who does not represent his interest. However, I am very familiar with the mediation process. Mediation is a non-binding process where the parties will attempt to work a resolution to the dispute. In other words, the mediator cannot force a solution onto the parties, and only the parties themselves can reach an agreement on mediation. In essence, your brother should attend the mediation and present his side of the story to the mediator. The mediator, as a neutral party, will attempt to help the parties reach a common gound on the issues. Therefore, by attending mediation, maybe some of the issues can be resolved, or at least closer to being resolved. Since the mediator has no pwoer to force his will on the parties, attending mediation is essentially a "free spin" to try to resolve the issues.
If your brother truly cannot afford a lawyer, I would encourage him to check out a pro bono clinic in your area, and a lawyer may be willing to take his case for free. Unfortunately, this sounds like a complex situation that may not be resolved outside of the court system, and if your brother doesn’t have a lawyer, he may end up on the short side of the stick on this one. If you want to read more about the mediation process, I have posted a source article.
Divorce On A Budget: Self Help Divorce, Attorney Consultations & Minimizing Costs
Divorce On A Budget: Self Help Divorce, Attorney Consultations & Minimizing Costs
Divorce On A Budget: Self Help Divorce, Attorney Consultations & Minimizing Costs
As most divorce lawyers will tell you, the least expensive way to achieve a divorce is through an amicable settlement involving both parties. If you and your spouse can agree on child custody (if applicable), alimony, the division of assets and other important information relating to the divorce, you may be able to achieve satisfaction through divorce mediation. Because a neutral third-party individual presides over the matter, both you and your spouse will need to seek the help of a divorce attorney if preferred. Although not required, a divorce lawyer can offer important information throughout the mediation process, including your rights under the current divorce laws and advice on divorce that you may not otherwise consider. A divorce mediation is quicker and more affordable than a lengthy litigation process through divorce court. There are several instances in which divorce mediation may not be an option, including a marriage that has a history of abuse or when one spouse is fearful of the other.
If you prefer to file divorce papers independently after having researched your own self help divorce information, it may still be to your benefit to consult with a professional divorce lawyer. In many cases, divorce attorneys offer a free initial consultation. It is important to inquire about this policy prior to scheduling a meeting, however, as every divorce lawyer has his/her own guidelines when it comes to client meetings and/or telephone calls. If you are able to schedule a free or low-cost consultation, it may be well worth your time to speak with a professional who can offer valuable divorce advice on your case. Because divorce lawyers are experienced and knowledgeable about local divorce laws, you may find that the information gained is priceless. Even if you choose to proceed with filing the divorce papers yourself, having spoken with a divorce attorney may prove to be helpful in the future. This is especially true if a problem should arise within the case and you can then retain the services of that same attorney who is already familiar with your situation.
In most areas, legal aid is also available to help those who are financially strapped and still need help with legal issues. Because the litigation process through divorce court is both complex and lengthy, the legal fees can quickly add up. In some instances, a trial may be the only option. For those who can work together, settle their matters in a civilized and fair fashion and wish to minimize their expenses, consulting with a divorce lawyer about various options may be a good idea. Unless you have a very good understanding of local divorce laws and the legal process in general, filing your own divorce papers may be difficult. If nothing else, a divorce attorney can help you to get the appropriate papers completed and filed while offering professional divorce advice to help make this stressful time a little less painful for all involved.
The information contained in this article is designed to be used for reference purposes only. It should not be used as, in place of or in conjunction with professional legal advice regarding divorce, child custody, alimony, self help divorce and/or divorce laws. If you are in need of divorce advice or are considering a marriage separation, consult with a professional divorce lawyer in your area for further information and/or divorce advice.
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Andrew Daigle is an author and creator of many informational websites including Divorce Attorney Search, Mesothelioma Attorney Search and many more.
Divorce Recovery: Releasing the Toxic Emotions
Shelley Stile ~ Life Coach/Divorce Recovery for Women
The way to recover and thrive after divorce is simple: Until you can release the toxic emotions surrounding your divorce, it is impossible for you to move forward in life and be happy. It takes enormous commitment and effort but it can be achieved. If you want to lead a new life that is both fulfilling and happy, you must let go of the negative emotions and thoughts that hold you back from creating a life you love. And guess what else? Who do you suppose pays the biggest price when it comes to toxic emotions? You.
During the divorce process, the negative emotions that you were already experiencing in your marriage go haywire! During times of crisis, our world appears to crumble and with it our concept of whom we are. Our mind chatter turns up the volume to deafening levels. We question everything. We feel emotions so intense that we often wonder if we will survive them. Anger, sadness, depression, rage, grief, resentment, bitterness, and confusion are some of the feelings we are hit with.
Read the rest of this entry »
Recovering from Divorce: Honoring the Truth
Do you remember the old adage that states there’s your side, there’s my side and then there’s the truth? If we were totally honest with ourselves, we too could see the truth of any situation. Once we accept that truth, we have the newfound freedom to gain clarity, discover our options and make real choices that are based in reality and not a subjective interpretation of what is. The past no longer runs the show. A world of possibilities opens that we might otherwise have missed. To recover from divorce one must face the truth.
The gist of the adage is that we don’t really see reality for what it is. Rather we see things through our interpretive abilities and we interpret things based on our past experiences. Reality gets fine tuned through our own personal filters. We live in a world based on the past, a world that no longer exists.
The Real Divorce: Cutting the Emotional Ties that Bind
Your divorce decree is only step one in moving into a new life after divorce. The real divorce is the cutting of the emotional, mental and physical ties that still bind you to your ex-husband. This is the real work of divorce recovery: becoming a single woman possessed of confidence, self-esteem, an enthusiasm for life and most important, a complete break from the emotional turmoil that led to your divorce in the first place.
All too often, women experience the same conflicts with their ex that originally led to divorce: constant arguments, reactive behavior leading to emotional upsets, old patterns of reliance, the barrage of destructive barbs aimed at your self-esteem and deep hurts. To truly be divorced you must put forth great effort and inner work that will sever your ties to your ex and you must build a structure that will facilitate that work.
Let me give you examples: You and your ex have children together therefore you must be in contact with one another on a regular basis. Unfortunately, your discussions with him always end in an argument. Nothing happens easily. The deep resentments and hurts suffered in your marriage and actual divorce remain intact. You each know each other’s hot buttons and continue to push those buttons resulting in upsets. It’s the old marriage still running the game. You continually get sucked into this abyss.
Divorce Recovery: Releasing the Toxic Emotions
Shelley Stile
Life Coach/Divorce Recovery for Women
The way to recover and thrive after divorce is simple: Until you can release the toxic emotions surrounding your divorce, it is impossible for you to move forward in life and be happy. It takes enormous commitment and effort but it can be achieved. If you want to lead a new life that is both fulfilling and happy, you must let go of the negative emotions and thoughts that hold you back from creating a life you love. And guess what else? Who do you suppose pays the biggest price when it comes to toxic emotions? You.
During the divorce process, the negative emotions that you were already experiencing in your marriage go haywire! During times of crisis, our world appears to crumble and with it our concept of whom we are. Our mind chatter turns up the volume to deafening levels. We question everything. We feel emotions so intense that we often wonder if we will survive them. Anger, sadness, depression, rage, grief, resentment, bitterness, and confusion are some of the feelings we are hit with.
Read the rest of this entry »
Nine Ways to Deal with the System in Tough Times
9. Once your divorce is filed, find out as much as you can about the judge.
8. Stay out of court as much as possible because court appearances are costly, not only financially, but also from an emotional standpoint. Judges will not know you or your case unless you are in a situation where you are in court every week on motions or hearings, and often the judge will be getting a very negative impression of you.
7. Make sure that you and your attorney are well prepared before you go to court. Floundering around in court can create a bad impression, and is also costly.
6. Through your attorney, see if your judge is one who will cut court appearances to minimize expense. This can be done by, in some instances, having original pre-trials and some court appearances done by phone if the judge and the other attorney will agree.
Divorce and Bankruptcy
In these troubled economic times, more and more people are turning to the protection of the U.S. Bankruptcy Code to resolve their debts and protect their property from foreclosure and repossession.
More than 1 million people filed bankruptcy last year alone, and the numbers are only climbing as the recession hits homes.
Some people are finding that in order for them to save their homes from foreclosure or to gain control of their bills, they need to file bankruptcy in the middle of their divorce.
This can lead to many questions as the legal proceedings of bankruptcy and divorce intersect.
Read on to get answers to some bankruptcy and divorce questions you may have.
Read the rest of this entry »
Divorce and Bankruptcy
In these troubled economic times, more and more people are turning to the protection of the U.S. Bankruptcy Code to resolve their debts and protect their property from foreclosure and repossession.
More than 1 million people filed bankruptcy last year alone, and the numbers are only climbing as the recession hits homes.
Some people are finding that in order for them to save their homes from foreclosure or to gain control of their bills, they need to file bankruptcy in the middle of their divorce.
This can lead to many questions as the legal proceedings of bankruptcy and divorce intersect.
Read on to get answers to some bankruptcy and divorce questions you may have.
Read the rest of this entry »